5 Ways Solo Travel Changed My Life

By: Crystal Adair-Benning

I was born an only child to the worlds best parents. No, seriously. They are pretty darn incredible. Still married and madly in love, I was doted upon and yes sometimes spoiled. However, they taught me the value of a dollar, hardwork is everything and then independence wasn’t an option but a necessity.

Growing up, I remember being surrounded by others but always wanting (and needing) my alone time. I was a lone cowgirl who preferred reading over video games. I played volleyball and went skiing. I loved the water and wanted to be a mermaid. I was active and involved yet incredibly quiet, shy and introverted.

When I went to University; it changed me.

I was always studious but in academia, I wasn’t as strong a student as I had once been. I was distracted – by working a full-time job, by boys, by life. I felt itchy to explore and not to sit still in my classrooms splicing film strips or editing soundbites (I was a media student afterall).

So, one day, I just up and quit. Just like that.

I decided that academia could wait awhile and I took a leap of faith and bought a plane ticket – to Europe. I figured if I wanted to go solo, I should start somewhere that wouldn’t be too daunting – I went to the United Kingdom. English is still the predominant language but it felt “foreign enough” at the time.

I loved it… but it wasn’t enough.

Next thing I knew, I had flights to Australia, Thailand, Bali, Laos, Cambodia, China, Jamaica, Turks & Caicos, Colombia, Puerto Rico, India, Mexico, and New Zealand under my belt.

And something transformational happened…

1. I stopped being so scared of the world and everyone in it. I had to focus minute by minute on the people who were there with me, surrounding me. Whether it was trying to get past a language barrier or just sorting out a train schedule. I had to surrender to the universe that sometimes I may get it wrong but it was nothing to be afraid of. We ALL make mistakes from time to time.

2. The being alone isn’t lonely. I was always seeking out being alone when I was a child but when you travel solo, you are alone. I never found it lonely though. There is always someone around interested in you, wanting to talk or offering you an experience. You don’t have to be alone and lonely – that’s a choice. Choose to be alone and lovely instead.

3. That independence is overrated. Know what I found most challenging and enlightening? To be independent and able to take care of yourself is amazing but too much independence and not co-dependence (sharing the burdens with someone), it just isn’t fun. You don’t have to be co-dependent all the time. That’s frightening. However, allowing yourself to let others in and care for you is a joy. Try it.

4. The language barriers are only a barrier if you make them. I’ve done sign language, charades, guidebook translations and cellphone apps. The language that exists everywhere = love. If you try your hardest, have a sense of humour about it and make the most of it there is no language barrier too large to overcome. Trust me – I don’t speak chinese and managed just fine!

5. Your world expands with solo travel. Staying at home, my world was so tight-knit and enclosed. I had a small group around me and it was neat and tidy. Travelling abroad, especially solo, changes that – you meet new people, have new experiences, see how others live. It changes you. You sometimes change it.

The world is vast and yet our experiences within it are often so small. Going solo. Seeing the world. It changed me – for the better. I encourage every single person I meet to get out there and just do it. Don’t think too hard about it that you change your mind. Just try on someone elses’ life for a moment and see how it feels. I promise you, it’ll change you for the better.

Now, where did I leave my pack… it’s time for my next adventure…

 
Crystal Adair-Benning is a Planner of Once-in-a-Lifetime Awesomeness with her company Distinct Occasions. She lives in Toronto and just released a BESTSELLING BOOK – Wedding Planner Problems.

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